Thoughts,Songs,Writings,Rants,Encouragements, and Life

Sunday, June 26, 2005

-Baskin Robins-

Thirty-one flavors of ice cream
And I don't know which one to choose
Mint-chip, Vanilla, or Chocolate moose
None of them seem to be you

Thirty-one flavors of ice cream
I think I might need a spoon
Rocky road, butterscotch, strawberry to
None of them remind me of you

Thirty-one flavors of ice cream
Tried all but a limited few
Cookie-dough, mango, coffee...COFFEE!!
Now that one is totally YOU!

Coffee please, dish me up two big scoops
One for me and of course,theres one for you too.

Thursday, June 23, 2005

Tyler...check him out in the Friends section

Tuesday, February 10, 2004Not Quite Romeo (1999)
I met a girl yesterday
I hit her car with mine
I was glad to see her face
She wasn't so glad to see mine

She asked me for my number
I couldn't believe my luck
She took down my license
We talked about her truck

And she said many strange words
Colorful and bright
And she said many strange words
Colorful and bright

I asked for her number
She said that she'd call ME
I introduced myself as best I could
She affectionately called me creep.

I think I'm pretty good with girls
I think they like me lots
I think I'm quite the ladies man
They seem to think I'm not

I called a girl last night
She said that she was gone
I called a girl today
Washing her hair is taking quite long

I'm not quite Romeo
I know I have it in me
And maybe just maybe
Juliet will call me back

Satisfy your soul: Dr Bruce Demarest

"the deepest desire of our hearts is for union with God. from the first moment of our existence our most powerful yearning is to fulfill the origional purposer of our lives-'to see him more clearly, love HIM more dearly, follow HIM nearly.' we are made for God, adn nothing less will really satisfy us." - Brennon Manning

Wednesday, June 22, 2005

Random happenings in India

This happened a while ago...but should be noted as one of the wierdest things I have ever seen in India to date...

Man walks down the streets of India...I notice the man from my seat inside a nice Air Conditioned vehicle. Typical Indian no hurry...walking down the middle of the road, oblivious to the rest of the world around him...and then I watch in utter fascination at what the man does when he comes upon an old and unhealthy looking cow in the middle of this mans path...the man passes the cow and immediately turns to the hind-quarters of the cow...the man proceeds to bow his head and gently lift the unsuspecting cows tail up from its rear. The man then brushes the cows tail across his face...drops the tail and proceeds along the road as if nothing un-normal had just happened...

I sit in the car and wonder why this man has just put a nasty cows tail covered in poop on his face??? Is this some kind of curse? Some kind of Karma? Some kind of blessing?? I really dont know...but it was rather funny...and disgusting...

Tuesday, June 21, 2005

-The Room-

I need to clarify something here....this story is FICTION!!! None of the events in this story was something I wrote a few weeks after graduating from High School in 2002...the Grammar is terrible...the thought process is shaky...but I really like the potential for this story...I probably should work on it some more...that said...enjoy...

It had been quite some time since I had last placed foot inside the room. And as I walked in I knew this was going to be hard and utterly depressing. I had hidden from that moment for so long. My eyes did a quick scan of the room. The small bed was still in the corner, the sheets still clinging to the old mattress. The oak dresser hugged the wall at the end of the bed. Drawers still full of the clothes she left behind to someday be taken to some thrift store, where some punk kid would find another kids past and this kids fashion. The walls still were adorned with posters, pictures, knick-knacks, and memories. The bookshelf in the corner, although very dusty, still had every book I loved and lived through in high school. The stereo that had sung its better days in the early nineties demanded the attention of the final corner of the room next to the closet. I opened the doors as if to a whole different world and I was taken on a ride down memory lane back to the days of yesterday.

I loved and feared these four walls of my past. I say feared because the snap shot of her is imprinted in this room and ultimately my mind. She was everything to me and she will remain only in this room. This is the only place you will find her. I have shut her out of everything else that I am dedicated to. I have hidden her here in this room.

The bed where she slept and spent countless nights dreaming, thinking of her future, and really just losing sleep. This bed is a lot like my own bed at home, the one where I spent nights devoted to the thought of her and our future. The visions of being with her and prayers that were heard from this bed, but sadly lost that day. The day she was take from this petty world. And now the skylight above that bed of hers will lead all who look through it, to not just wish on the heavenly stars, but look at those stars and see her sparkling eyes shining back to earth.
She always loved the “ heavens” and I will be obsessed from now on with this heaven, the one that clothes me every day. The dresser is covered in pictures of the two of us, and our spontaneous adventures. The adventures taking us to the beach, mountains, states, and lakes all ending in some fun moment planned by her or me.

The mirror just above the dresser does not completely reflect the man I am because of her. It only imitates what I react to, and how I dress, it has no clue how I feel inside. The styles and trends that formed me and truly her will remain inside these drawers. Her drawers that have held not just articles of clothing, but a box of memories as well. The letters from her, sacred pictures, ticket stubs to romantic tragedies. (Yes those are just like the ones plastered upon the walls.)

Every moment of her and I is documented, and captured on these four walls. In the box is the photo of her and I on our first date and my favorite our first kiss on top of the Ferris wheel at the state fair. Posters of bands, people, culture, and her dramatic interest claim most of the cluttered space, all-leading to a towering case of books. Books I she read and I read dozens of times, from the works of Crichton and Grisham, to Tozer and C.S. Lewis. Novels, poetry, fiction, scripts, documents, and theological statements took up most of the space on the shelves.
One of the shelves was dedicated to the Bible and her fascination with it. This is where I have found my true inspiration to live with her gone. For in these pages is life, a gift of love, and hope for all who receive this love. She claimed it and believed it with her all. Although I think she just tagged along with my faith. She had good intentions and we were one together in Christ.
We worshiped him together. Many a day we would pop in a disc and sing away to some new worship tune, and I would try and sing my best and it would make her laugh. Funny how the same machine played our favorite songs to dance to be skylight, songs of love, happiness, depression, death, life, and conviction. I cherish the moments when we would dance together more than anything else in life. Fir it’s dancing with her where I fell in love with her. A not easily broken, but the dance shoes have disappeared into the closet for now.

A closet with dresses, sweatshirts, costumes, shoes, and boxes of who she was and tried to be. Yes dresses she hated to wear because it wasn’t her style. Sweatshirts formerly mine that she loved to wear because she liked how they fit. Costumes she wore in all her theatrical personalities. Someone had to play the part and she became one with the character. And look, there are her dancing shoes; right in front of the sandals she wore our last day together. The sand still streaming from them when I pick them up, and the smell of the sea captivates me. That smell reminds me of that dreadful day. I can still see that cobalt wave crashing over her and stealing the breath from her lungs and then claiming her body to the curl and pull of the waves that would suffocate and steal her beautiful life.

The memory hurts and cuts like a knife, but hope and grace shine from above. A light is suddenly shining on the most incredible object in the room, the journal that holds everything inside its pages. And you open it and are relieved to find yourself again, the thought and spark of moving on in life, living with an undying passion stoked by a love stronger than a death and hate in itself. I am compelled to smile as I walk out of the room. For no longer will she be hidden here in this lonely room, she will be shared to all who listen and this room is just a museum of that which she held dear, but a reminder that we cannot stop from living life and letting our faith shine through it. As I shut the door I am motivated to scream out a life worth living and a God worth sharing, and so I walk on and into this blind world.-Me

Monday, June 20, 2005

God speaks to man-Essene gospel of peace

I speak to you through the peace of the evening
be still
know I am God
I speak to you through the splendor of the sun
be still
know I am God
I speak to you through the brilliant stars
be still
know I am God
I speak to you through the storm and the clouds
be still
know I am God
I speak to you through the thunder and lightening
be still
know I am God
I speak to you through the mysterious rainbow
be still
know I am God
I will speak to you when you are alone
be still
know I am God
I will speak to you through the wisdom of the ancients
be still
know I am God
I will speak to you at the end of time
be still
know I am God
I will speak to you when you have seen my angels
be still
know I am God
I will speak to you throughout eternity
be still
know I am God
I speak to you
be still
know I am God

Friday, June 17, 2005

Its all over now

TeenStreet is officially over for this year...hooray...tear...sigh...laugh....ahhhh!!! This week has been a blast and i have thouroughly enjoyed getting to know over 200 students from all over india...

this week was fun, but also overwhelming...8 americans joined the OM campus this past week...this adding to the three americans, one UKer, and Dutchman that were already here. Lets just say i am way overwhelmed with accents, english, and just pure whiteness!!! never thought i would be so overwhelmed by so many of the motherland peeps...

Thursday, June 09, 2005

How to build a Basketball hoop in india

step one...find very large "fallen" tree...find six strong guys to help carry the tree to designated basketball area.
step two...find piece of wood (preferable flat) to use as a back board
Step three...nail "back"-board to tree (do not use eight inch nails, this will result in an hour of to much work, use four inch nails instead for maximum quikness)
step four...purchase rim and net (500 rupies)
step five...atach net
Step six...attach rim to backboard (again please use four inch nails...screw guns arent used or anywhere to be found, nails are a good substitute)
step seven...dig very large hole for tree to consume
step eight...put tree in hole
step nine..pull tree out of hole (tree is to big and results in 15 foot high hoop instead of 10 foot)
step ten...cut off part of tree
Step eleven...put in hole...(again to big)
step twelve...pull out of hole
step thirteen...cut again
step fourteen..put back in hole
step five-teen...realize the rim is crooked
step sixteen...get basketball and play anyways...
step seventeen...fix rim..
step ball...

Sunday, June 05, 2005

Motorcycle diaries

Well Folks I am alive...That is all I can say...

Motorcycles are crazy pieces of machinery...Scary!!!

On Friday I had lesson number three on a put it mildly
I was scared spitless...but I learned two important lessons....

1. Do not hold the accelarator on while trying to put the breaks on...(this will result in major skidding and loss of bike control)

2. Never....unless you are absolutely sure...pass an auto rickshaw on the roads here in india...

Normally I ride only on the campus... but today would be a different story... Kevin would be riding on another bike along side or behind me... he guided me and told me where to go...we stayed on campus for like two minutes and then he was like okay... now go to the gate and wait... I waited in fear of the words "now go out and I will tell you what to do next..." we rode for a little while on roads that were not congested much...then Kevin had me turn onto a main road...(Ben is terrified) and I stalled three times before getting onto the more than one minute onto the ride on the road than I come up to a slow auto rickshaw.... I think "I will pass him"... I check to make sure its safe... well a truck is coming but he is a ways away... but I am still uncetain and not too confident... another bike passes through... so I go for it... the truck was closer than I thought... I nearly became a squashed bug on the windshield... the space between the rickshaw and truck was barely enough to fit the bike through... and I ducked out of instinct when I went through... if I had not ducked my head would have hit the truck's mirror and I would have flown off of the bike... I nearly killed myself...and all I could do was tremble and then laugh at how I had cheated death... Kevin thought I was a gonner... he tells the story better... he watched the whole thing in horror...

so now I await my next time on a bike... maybe I will not get as close to death this next time...